The Many Flirtations of Bob, Jr.

Aramel · November 2016

Posted because it's hilarious, and also by request. Paging @Luce and @Karlach.

----

A crumbling foyer.
Light filters into this old, crumbling house through cracks in the ceiling high
above, particles of dust dancing through these illuminated shafts as it falls
towards the rickety wooden slats of the floor below. A threadbear rug caked with
mud sits by the doorway, welcoming any unfortunate enough to find themselves
inside. Sconces along the wall hold blobs of wax, the wicks of the candles long
burned away. Chilling whispers fill the otherwise silent foyer, echoing from deep
within the house's walls. Bob Junior stands here, ignoring those gathered about
him as he fiddles with the buttons of his jacket. Trader Bob stands here with his
hands on his hips. Grinning mischievously, Tokoloshe, the kitsune runs about in
circles here, his body shifting rapidly into different states of matter. The
vision of a winter flurry rages within Areus, the kitsune, who stands here
peacefully. There are 22 sapphiric skylarks here. There are 20 green parakeets
here. There are 22 curious young kittens here. There are 20 frisky puppies here.
There are 9 hamsters in a cage-wheel here. Regally surveying his surroundings, a
stainless steel maned lion with shattered, ragged wings stalks here. Trailing
fluttering motes of dreams, the evanescent form of a blithe dream phoenix lingers
here, delicate wings of iridescent dream motes cascading behind her. Snarling and
slavering, a massive mauve rage worg with wings of woven spidersilk waits here.
<Also loads of players.>

Bob Junior says, "Ugh. Dad. You are cramping my style."

Trader Bob says, "Junior, we talked about this."

Edith Shee-Slaugh, Keeper of the Nest whispers to Bob Junior, "Aren't you a

handsome young man."

Edith's eyes twinkle gently, a wry smile tweaking the corners of her mouth.

Truda Ysav'rai says to Bob Junior, "You have a hook hand."

Bob Junior says, "You're no fun. That's probably why mom lef... Welcome to the

party."

Trader Bob clears his throat.

Truda Ysav'rai says, "Was your mother named Bob, as well?"

Truda tilts her head curiously.

Trader Bob says, "By Nil, why does that man have so many animals with him?"

You have emoted: Aramel laughs before she can help herself, then turns it into a

small cough.

Aeromage Luce Shevat says to Bob Junior, "Drinking problem. Very tragic."

Falmiis Shevat says, "He loves animals, is all."

You say to Trader Bob, "It is his habit. I have often asked myself the same thing."

Bob Junior says, "To trude (Brushing his hair back) enough about my mother, how

are you?"

Bob Junior says to Truda, "You didn't bring a date, did you?"

Bob Junior says, "Because you know what would look good on your arm? Me."

Shaking her head, Truda Ysav'rai says, "I do not like fruit, much."

You say to Bob Junior, "You know, if you're trying to flirt with several people

at once, it often backfires if you do it in their hearing."

Bob Junior says, "Psh, you all love me. Can't help it, can you? I mean, look at

me."

Truda Ysav'rai asks Bob Junior, "Is this an invitation to skewer you upon my

claws?"

Bob Junior says to Truda, "Playing hard to get, eh? I like my women feisty."

With some amusement, as an aside, you say, "Here is one who will definitely be

immune to head explosions."

High Inquisitor Kreon Zayah, The Dawn's Blade says to Truda, "I think that was a

yes."

A skittering spider runs up to Aramel and takes a bite! [I still don't know who the spider was, but this made me laugh IRL]

You peer about yourself unscrupulously.

Stiffly, you say, "I do not like insects."

Bob Junior says to you, "Oh, an elfen. Dad did tell me you lot were quite

beautiful."

Truda Ysav'rai says, "I am sorry, confusing man. I would like to go and see this

house of haunting, now. I will have to get back to you, on the clawing."

A skittering spider scrambles away to find another meal.

Bob Junior nudges Trader Bob and says, "Right dad?"

High Inquisitor Kreon Zayah, The Dawn's Blade looks surprised and says, "Trade

Bob with fancies for elves."

Truda gives a polite, if confused, wave, then heads off.

Bob Junior says to Kreon, "He's spent many a drunken night in the forests, but

you didn't hear that from me."

Bob Junior looks about himself suspiciously.

High Inquisitor Kreon Zayah, The Dawn's Blade says, "Sounds like Doman in his

youth."

Bob Junior says, "Probably some with Doman too, yes."

Bob Junior swings his arm up and high fives Kreon enthusiastically.

Doman waggles his eyebrows comically.

"Doctor" Zitto Shevat says, "Why does nobody recognize an excellent surgeon

costume when they see one? Do they think this is just how all Hallifaxian

scholars dress all the time?"

Trader Bob says, "Probably."

With a wink, Bob Junior says, "I've never seen one dressed, if you know what I

mean."

Bob Junior swings his arm up and high fives Zitto enthusiastically.

Bob Junior utters a deep, rumbling laugh.

"Doctor" Zitto Shevat says to Bob Junior, "Don't you have 'babes' to chase?"

Doman Trueflight, Mystic Visionary says to Zitto, "You're really lacking the

spirit, you know."

Bob Junior yells, "Dad, I'm going to be a man tonight!"

You peer at Bob Junior unscrupulously.

Bob Junior says, "Maybe we can just skip the show and go back to your places?"

Ulalah Stormcrow, the Nightmare's Foxglove says to you, "No! He is ours, we have

claimed him for the Wyrd."

Cheerfully, you say, "Oh, you have? Good."

Bob Junior says to you, "There is enough of Junior to go around, babe."

"Shoo! Shoo!" Ulalah says to you as she waves you away.

Edith Shee-Slaugh, Keeper of the Black Nest whispers to Ulalah, "Shall we take

him, cousin?"

Edith Shee-Slaugh, Keeper of the Black Nest whispers to Ulalah, "You would look

very dapper within my nest."

You say to Bob Junior, "You're too young for me, dear."

Bob Junior says to you, "I'm about to be 20, though."

Bob Junior quickly dusts himself off.

Bob Junior says to Edith, "Even with that on, I can still see your true beauty."

An ugly wiccan hag's eyes sparkle with amusement.

Bob Junior adjusts his coat, buttoning it so it covers just below the waist.

An ugly wiccan hag says to Bob Junior, "Such a smooth talker."

Celthir of the Hemlock murmurs to Crek, "Have to admit, he just doesn't give up."

Bob Junior says, "Huh... wha... yeah. Hey ladies."

You have emoted: Aramel gives in to the absurdity of the moment, her frame

shaking with suppressed laughter as she leans against a wall.

Adjust his costume a bit more in an attempt to conceal something, Bob Junior says,

"So many beautiful ladies here tonight."

Bob Junior fans himself as sweat begins to form on his brow.

Turning towards Bob, Lord-Librarian Portius Nitraedes, Paragon of Progress says,

"Are there?"

"Doctor" Zitto Shevat says to Bob Junior, "It helps to distract yourself. Think

of something boring or depressing, like the prospect of having to listen to your

father talk about finances."

Ilistala eyes Falmiis warily, settling into a predatory crouch.

Ulalah leans close to Falmiis and gently lays a kiss upon his forehead.

Ulalah stares implacably at Falmiis.

Ulalah leans close to Ilistala, an enormous leopard and gently lays a kiss upon

her forehead.

A loud rumbling emanates from Ilistala as she rubs against Ulalah.

Bob Junior says to Falmiis, "Hey, stay away from my woman."

Ulalah Stormcrow, the Nightmare's Foxglove whispers to Ilistala, an enormous

leopard, "You are the pretty one."

Falmiis Shevat looks skeptical and says, "I'm innocent."

A tormented spirit says, "He is always groping cousin Ulalah, that Falmiis."

Bob Junior brings his fist and hook before his chest as he eyes Falmiis.

You have emoted: Aramel looks briefly into the air, a wry smile flashing across
her face.

Bob Junior says, "That's what I thought."

A tormented spirit says, "I think you can take him, Bob."

Edith Shee-Slaugh, Keeper of the Black Nest whispers to Bob Junior, "Young and

handsome, one - I shall be leaving. Seek my nest, if you wish to provide the

amusement you seemed so keen for."

Falmiis Shevat says, "Alright, let's settle this, Bob."

Edith Shee-Slaugh, Keeper of the Black Nest whispers to Bob Junior, "I will make

you scream and bleed like no other."

Edith's eyes twinkle enchantingly.

Bob Junior says, "Oh, I am counting down the days, beautiful."

Bob Junior says, "Soon as dad lets me leave."

Lord-Librarian Portius Nitraedes, Paragon of Progress says, "Why wait? A little

bit of patricide adds spice to an affair."

Falmiis Shevat says, "Nineteen going on twenty and still bound by your father's

will? What sort of man are you?"

Celthir of the Hemlock says, "Oh, we even get a show too. Good thing I got my

snack before I came here."

Wiping the sweat from his forehead, Bob Junior says, "I think I need a drink."

Bob Junior strolls out to the north, fiddling with his hooked hand.

-----

Halloween show + Vengeance game.
-----

Afterwards:

Deadly Vixen, Sohei Dahlla D'Cente, of the Quietus Innocence says, "Stupid killer killed me."

Truda Ysav'rai says, "At least you lived for more than the initial night."

Bob Junior says to Dahlla, "I can make it all better."

Bob Junior says to Ulalah, "For the both of you."

Kalas Delsea, Kalon Dilletante looks skeptical and says to Bob Junior, "I'm not sure you'd know how."

Truda Ysav'rai says, "Ok, someone please must explain. For what reason does Young Bob approach all of the women, and for what reason do they enjoy this?"

Ulalah Stormcrow, the Nightmare's Foxglove says to Bob Junior, "I do not canoodle. T'would be a lot of time sipping tea and pleasing Father Spooky-One."

Karlach Stormcrow, Master of the Bloodhunt says, "Sister of mine is also rather well spoken for."

Bob Junior says, "I can show you spooky."

Bob Junior waggles his eyebrows comically.

Sounding resigned, you say, "I think it is his nature."

You smile impishly and say, "Or perhaps he has never seen a woman before."

Scoffing, Bob Junior says, "I... I've had plenty of the ladies."

Playing along, Ulalah Stormcrow, the Nightmare's Foxglove says to Bob Junior, "Lucky fellow. I have not."

Bob Junior says, "I can take you back to my place and show you some of them."

Bob Junior winks knowingly.

A wry smile spreads across Ulalah's face.

Aeromage Luce Shevat asks, "Are these ladies livestock or automatons, then?"

Bob Junior says, "I'll give you an insertion."

Truda shakes her head.

Bob Junior utters a deep, rumbling laugh.

You have emoted: Aramel looks amused and says, glancing at Bob Junior, "He is like one who, instead of concentrating on one target, half-heartedly kicks at everything and hopes that something will fall at his feet."

Bob Junior says, "Don't try to resist my charm, ladies, it will only make you fall harder."

Truda Ysav'rai says, "Strange, the more you speak, the less I like you."

Truda peers at Bob Junior unscrupulously.

An imposing reaper says, "I hear nothing falls harder than a corpse, particularly human ones."

Ulalah puffs up her cheeks, looking up into the sky.

Bob Junior flirts wittily with Ulalah.

Aeromage Luce Shevat says to Bob Junior, "I believe, young man, you are skirting dangerously close to your ego writing promisary notes you lack the ability to make good on."

Bob Junior says, "Oh, I have the ability."

Bob Junior leans back, jutting his hips forward slightly.

Hopefully, you ask Bob Junior, "Perhaps you could pursue the gentlemen instead?"

Bob Junior says, "Psh. I'm a ladies man."

Bob Junior says, "Although, Luce is quite pretty, for a dude."

Ulalah Stormcrow, the Nightmare's Foxglove says to Bob Junior, "My husband is a very beautiful man. He looks lovely in dresses. You would like him, I am certain, even more than I."

Karlach Stormcrow, Master of the Bloodhunt says, "Continue your level of debauchery and you'll be a lady, man."

Bob Junior says to Luce, "In the right light..."

Dahlla gives a trillingly melodic laugh.

A masked royal kephera says, "Almost as good, yes?"

You say to Luce, "You have my gratitude for the diversion."

Bob Junior says to you, "Don't think I forgot about you."

Luce grits his teeth and grips a crystalline staff tightly. "Clearly someone can spend his whole life not sleeping."

Ulalah Stormcrow, the Nightmare's Foxglove whispers to Karlach, "You make such a fetching omen of death, brother."

Ulalah rubs the backs of her hands against her eyes gently.

Bob Junior cups Ulalah's cheek and whispers, "Don't fall asleep on me now, beautiful."

An imposing reaper says to Ulalah, "I'll be departing for now, if he makes any further advances on you, cut his hands off and his tongue o.."

Ulalah's eyes sparkle with amusement at Bob Junior.

Ulalah Stormcrow, the Nightmare's Foxglove says to Bob Junior, "My brother is greatly eager to pull your heart from your chest cavity for your flirtations, little small one; you are fearless indeed to continue."

Ixion doffs a visored darksteel greathelm to Ulalah.

Ulalah Stormcrow, the Nightmare's Foxglove asks Ixion, "The young Trade Bob fancies me, isn't that lovely?"

You say to Ulalah, "You and everyone else."

Bob Junior leans on Ulalah seeking consolation.

Bob Junior winks conspiratorially at you.

Ulalah Stormcrow, the Nightmare's Foxglove says to you, "Yes, but me mostly, for I am the most radiant of all of the mortal women."

Ulalah adjusts her hat with blackened hands.

A masked royal kephera says, "I think Lucidians tend to glow more than others."

You have emoted: Aramel smiles indulgently at Ulalah. "Of course," she says. "The young man is all yours, should you wish."

Aeromage Luce Shevat says, "And you haven't rejected his buffoonery."

Aeromage Luce Shevat says, "That helps."

"That would be rude," Ulalah Stormcrow points out to Luce easily, "And I am anything but rude."

Bob Junior says to Luce, "I'm sure you could join us too. I've never tasted a juice like yours."

Bob Junior sips the pumpkin spice ale from his cup.

Glowering, Luce bristles his fur angrily, his ears folding back against his head.

Ulalah Stormcrow casts a frost-bitten pout at Karlach.

You have emoted: Aramel's gaze flicks up to regard Bob Junior with a skeptical glance, before looking at the clearly agitated Luce. "It's bad for business," she remarks, "When you upset your guests. Perhaps your father would like to hear of this?"

Ulalah Stormcrow reaches out to pat Karlach's forearm in a gentle manner, the mist around her feet gathering opaqueness as she exhales more of it.

An imposing reaper glares angrily at Ulalah.

Bob Junior says, "I suppose your brother can watch if he so wishes."

Karlach Stormcrow, Master of the Bloodhunt says, "You can take that as a no."

Tutting softly, Ulalah Stormcrow, the Nightmare's Foxglove says, "Oh dear. He's upset brother."

Bob Junior says, "Hey hey hey. Whoa."

Deadly Vixen, Sohei Dahlla D'Cente, of the Quietus Innocence says, "Oh my a fight."

Doman Trueflight, Mystic Visionary says to Bob Junior, "You should probably stop attacking him, too,."

"Doctor" Zitto Shevat says, "I was told by the Magnagorans that most societies outside Hallifax only consider a party a success if somebody dies."

Ulalah Stormcrow, the Nightmare's Foxglove says to Dahlla, "Brother does not like the young one."

Bob Junior says to Ulalah, "You need to call your guard dog off, my little butterfly."

Karlach Stormcrow, Master of the Bloodhunt says, "He has a few moments more of trying before I end his miserable existence."

Deadly Vixen, Sohei Dahlla D'Cente, of the Quietus Innocence says to Ulalah, "A shame."

Offering a soft sigh, Ulalah Stormcrow, the Nightmare's Foxglove says to Bob Junior, "I can hardly stop my brother, alas."

Doman Trueflight, Mystic Visionary says to Bob Junior, "Seriously, you're not helping."

Ulalah pets a wood nymph ingratiatingly.

You have emoted: Aramel leads a wood nymph by the hand, away from Ulalah's touch. "Go well back to Faethorn," she says to the fae.

Ulalah's ice-tinged lips curve at the corners in a subtle, catlike smile as the nymph is sent away.

Swaying in place, Ulalah Stormcrow, the Nightmare's Foxglove says, "Oh, I am becoming drowsy. Farewell, little Bob spawnling; you were an amusing diversion."

Trader Bob exclaims, "My my my!"

Aeromage Luce Shevat says to Trader Bob, "Control your son."

Trader Bob exclaims, "Quite the game!"

Trader Bob gives up a round of applause.

Bob Junior looks exhausted and opens his mouth in an enormous yawn.

Bob Junior says, "Quite the boring game."

Bob Junior says, "All talk, no action."

Trader Bob exclaims, "Manners, Bob Junior!"

You smile impishly and say to Bob Junior, "Like yourself?"

Bob Junior says, "Pssshhhh..."

"Doctor" Zitto Shevat says to Bob Junior, "Remind you of your own life, then?"

Delsea smirks.

Bob Junior licks you.

You slap Bob Junior on the cheek.

Bob Junior says, "Action."

Falmiis Shevat asks, "Does Trader Bob sell liniment in his shop still?"

Kalas Delsea, Kalon Dilletante whispers, "The only action he's like to see."

You say to Trader Bob, "I concur with Luce. Control your son."

Aramel · November 2016

Bonus: Fortune-teller spats.

Amidst shelves of dusty books.

Water drips from cracks in ceiling, forming tiny puddles atop the carpets that

fill this once lavish library. Mildew scents the air, wafting away from patches

of mold that dot the space. Hundreds of books fill the shelves that line each

wall, each covered in a layer of dust so that whatever title graces its spine can

no longer be read. A large table sits at the rooms centre, covered in torn pages

and empty inkwells. Resting by the table, Pachima Mologmomo looks calm and

composed. Shimmering with a silver light, a crystal ball rests on the table upon

a silken cloth. Snarling and slavering, a massive mauve rage worg with wings of

woven spidersilk waits here. Trailing fluttering motes of dreams, the evanescent

form of a blithe dream phoenix lingers here, delicate wings of iridescent dream

motes cascading behind her. A solstice dragon lies coiled here, blowing puffs of

red and green smoke. Truda is here, pondering thoughtfully. She wields a vicious

manticore claw in each hand. Emeritus Ayisdra Ysav'rai is here. He wields a

leather sling in his left hand.

You see exits leading north, east (open door), and west.

Tilting her head, but with good humour, you say, "Can you read my fortune also?"

With an inviting gesture, Seer Pachima Mologmomo exclaims, "Why of course! Who

else can read fortunes as well as I can? Astrologers? Perish the thought!"

Seer Pachima Mologmomo says, "Come, sit! It will cost you only five hundred gold

coins to hear of the wonders the future has in store for you. Let us handle the

transaction first before we begin delving into the arcane."

With some acerbity, you say, "As an astrologer, I resent the implication."

You give 500 gold sovereigns to Seer Pachima Mologmomo.

Pushing the money to the side, Seer Pachima Mologmomo exclaims, "Excellent,

excellent! Make yourself comfortable and lay your hands upon the crystal ball

that it may savour your energy!"

[HINT]: You can now TOUCH BALL HERE to let it taste of your energy.

You reach out and touch a mysterious crystal ball.

A feeling like a hundred spiders running up your fingers through your arms and

onto your body shakes through your being as the crystal ball draws some of your

energy into itself.

Gazing into the crystal ball, Seer Pachima Mologmomo says, "Yesss, yes! I can see.

.. I can see..."

Seer Pachima Mologmomo peers into the crystal ball intently, hands moving in

enigmatic gestures about its surface.

The image within the crystal ball shifts, swirls of energy churning eagerly.

The table shudders beneath the crystal ball as a miniature bolt of lightning

appears to have struck within.

Curiously, to the crystal ball, Seer Pachima Mologmomo says, "What are you going

to show me, my darling?"

The cloudy essence within the crystal ball parts, revealing a clear sky with but

a single cloud contained within that Seer Pachima Mologmomo peers into

inquisitively.

Eyebrows rising, Seer Pachima Mologmomo says, "Oh my, the cloud is shaped like a..

. oh, right! I think the knight in silvery plate wishes you ill, perhaps you have

offended him."

Lips pursed in thought Seer Pachima Mologmomo waves her hands enigmatically over

the crystal ball, dismissing the cloudy sky from within.

Looking to the doorway, Seer Pachima Mologmomo says, "Anyone else?"

You look up into the air for divine inspiration.

With an arched eyebrow, Falmiis Shevat says to you, "Who is this knight in

silvery plate?"

High Inquisitor Kreon Zayah, The Dawn's Blade says to you, "You offended a knight,

for shame."

You laugh melodically at Falmiis.

You say to Falmiis, "I have been asking myself the same question."

Cheerfully, you say, "Perhaps it is the knights of Faethorn, when the Maeve comes

under the influence of New Moon."

You laughingly say to Seer Pachima Mologmomo, "You know, I'm really starting to

resent your incessant slandering of my fellow astrologers."

Seer Pachima Mologmomo lifts a dainty hand to his neckline, glancing about with

uncertain disdain.

Seer Pachima Mologmomo says, "I have been blessed by the Fates! My crystall ball

tells the truth unlike the stars."

Ordassa arrives from the east.

Ordassa greets Seer Pachima Mologmomo with a sincere smile.

With a twinkle in her eyes, Seer Pachima Mologmomo says, "The Fates have smiled

upon me, I can tell you your future."

You raise your nose slightly in the air and look down it at Seer Pachima

Mologmomo, confident in the knowledge that you are better than they are.

Junior Fellow Ordassa says, "Can you read my fortune, please?"

With an inviting gesture, Seer Pachima Mologmomo exclaims, "Why of course! Who

else can read fortunes as well as I can? Astrologers? Perish the thought!"

Ordassa raises an eyebrow at Seer Pachima Mologmomo.

Ordassa leaves to the east.

You smile impishly and say to Seer Pachima Mologmomo, "It seems that your

clientele thinks otherwise."

Seer Pachima Mologmomo says, "You mean all the dozens that have already had their

fortunes read? Sure sure."

Delsea greets Seer Pachima Mologmomo with a sincere smile.

With a twinkle in her eyes, Seer Pachima Mologmomo says, "The Fates have smiled

upon me, I can tell you your future."

Kalas Delsea, Kalon Dilletante says, "Can you read my fortune?"

With an inviting gesture, Seer Pachima Mologmomo exclaims, "Why of course! Who

else can read fortunes as well as I can? Astrologers? Perish the thought!"

You say to Delsea, "Betrayed by my own kin. How could you?"

Delsea peers about herself unscrupulously.

Kalas Delsea, Kalon Dilletante says, "What did I do?"

You say to Delsea, "Pachima and I were having a discussion on the merits of

astrology versus crystal balls."

Seer Pachima Mologmomo says, "I travelled through the Undervault one day and

fainted from fear when some gigant monstrosity pounced at me from a side tunnel.

When I awoke, whole, the ball was next to me. Curious no?"

Kalas Delsea, Kalon Dilletante says, "Oh, I'm sorry."

You say to Delsea, "It's quite all right. The stars shine high above, and care

not what some mortal thinks."

You nod solemnly.

The ghost of a smile passes fleetingly across Delsea's lips.

Kalas Delsea, Kalon Dilletante says, "True enough."

5 minutes later:

Seer Pachima Mologmomo shouts, "Come have your fortune read at the Haunted House!

Where a superior Seer knows the future better than some Astrologer!"

Breandryn · November 2016

The admin here are so brilliant and witty. Every event I've been fortunate enough to see or participate in has been just so amazing and fun.

Luce · November 2016

Poor Luce. I feel bad for torturing the poor guy, but it was too perfect to have him misinterpret this.

Falaeron · November 2016

Whoever was controlling Bob Junior was having too much fun.

Howdy, Stranger!

Quick Links

Categories

In this Discussion

The Many Flirtations of Bob, Jr.

Comments