Magnagora's Finest

Drocilla

This made me laugh all day. Still not over it. 

Magnagora faces off with the brightest minds of the Constabulary

(Magnagora): Esca says, "So n'Lochli manor is now blocked off."

An overweight city constable says, "Good morning, sir. Must ask you to move along. Constabulary business and such."

Pectus looks about herself suspiciously.

A laidback city constable says, "How's it going?"

Heresiarch Esca n'Lochli, Count of the Dominion says, "I'm afraid I cannot do that, as the way to my family's manor is blocked."

Conductor Pectus De'Ancariisa says, "My my. Nymerya will not be pleased."

Soloist Miralona n'Lochli says, "Well, this is awkward."

Vatul frowns at an overweight city constable.

A laidback city constable takes a long drag from his cigarette and puffs it out slowly.

With an incline of his head, Heresiarch Esca n'Lochli, Count of the Dominion says, "I must ask to be allowed passage."

A laidback city constable sucks on a piece of spinach lodged in his teeth possibly since Shallamar became Nil.

A laidback city constable says, "Commissioner said let nobody in, didn't he?"

A laidback city constable looks to the other constable for affirmation.

An overweight city constable says, "That he did."

Gavriel stares blankly at an overweight city constable.

As he briefly closes his eyes and pinches the bridge of his nose, Heresiarch Esca n'Lochli, Count of the Dominion murmurs, "Nil preserve me."

A laidback city constable says, "See, that he did."

Gavriel d'Vanecu, of Intrinsic Ire says to an overweight city constable, "You would deny the Heresiarch access to his own family's estate? Brave."

A laidback city constable inhales deeply on his cigarette and leans back against the door.

With authority, Heresiarch Esca n'Lochli, Count of the Dominion says, "I am the Steward of Magnagora and the Heresiarch of the Midnight Legions. You will remove the obstruction to the n'Lochli manor house."

A laidback city constable says, "Let nobody in he said, nobody, lady is all kinds of histerical."

A laidback city constable says, "Didn't he say so?"

A laidback city constable looks to the other constable for affirmation.

With a nod, an overweight city constable says, "Aye, that he did."

A laidback city constable acknowledges the point with a grave nod of his head.

Suspiciously, a laidback city constable says, "The Heresiarch?"

Conductor Pectus De'Ancariisa says, "Then would it not make sense that the lady would like to see her kin?"

Heresiarch Esca n'Lochli, Count of the Dominion asks, "Gentlemen, who pays your salaries?"

A laidback city constable looks to the other constable uncertainly.

With a pause, an overweight city constable says, "The commissioner, sir."

A laidback city constable tries to do a mental count but seems to be failing, the cogs not quite working.

At length, Heresiarch Esca n'Lochli, Count of the Dominion asks, "And who pays... his salary?"

With bored affectation, Gavriel inspects his nails idly.

A laidback city constable says, "Uuuu."

A laidback city constable says, "Mate?"

A laidback city constable says, "Who pays the big dog's salary?"

An overweight city constable says, "The Iron Council, I would think."

A laidback city constable chews on something old in his teeth.

Conductor Pectus De'Ancariisa smiles and says, "And what is the Heresiarch?"

Apprentice Kalas Iosen says, "Ah. So your salaries come through the treasury."

A laidback city constable says, "Sounds official but I uhmm.."

Sakaki thrusts his palm towards his forehead and hits it with a resounding *smack*!

Exultant, a laidback city constable exclaims, "Oh ya that!"

A laidback city constable says, "Treasurer pays the big dog."

Vatul d'Noceur, of the Danse Macabre says, "And who controls the treasury?"

A laidback city constable looks to the other constable uncertainly.

Vatul pointedly looks to Esca.

Proudly, an overweight city constable exclaims, "The treasurer!"

A laidback city constable says, "That's right."

A laidback city constable says, "You said it, mate."

Conductor Pectus De'Ancariisa says, "Then gentlemen, may I introduce Kalas Iosen. The Treasurer."

Heresiarch Esca n'Lochli, Count of the Dominion says, "That's not-- Prince stay my hand that I might have patience. It does not matter. The treasurer is here."

A laidback city constable says, "Whoa."

Gavriel pinches at the bridge of his mask, a hollow sigh echoing from within its depths.

Esca n'Lochli turns to Iosen and gestures towards the constables with barely restrained fury.

A laidback city constable boggles at Esca.

Apprentice Kalas Iosen says, "I believe you should allow the Heresiarch entry. Lest an accounting happen that lowers your wages."

A laidback city constable says, "You Heresiarch Iosen?"

Apprentice Kalas Iosen says, "No. I am not."

Mystagogue Kailanna n'Kylbar, Matriarch of Jackals says to Esca, "If we simply kill them, we can raise them as obedient undead and order them to let us pass. This grows tiresome."

Heresiarch Esca n'Lochli, Count of the Dominion says to Kailanna, "Forget that, sacrifice to Nil."

A laidback city constable spits to the ground and discards his cigarette.

Heresiarch Esca n'Lochli, Count of the Dominion says, "Or better. The Devourer is hungry."

Pectus ponders an overweight city constable thoughtfully, looking him up and down.

Esca sends a pointed glare at the constables, fingers cluching his symbol.

A laidback city constable exclaims, "Well slap my hiney and call me Prudenzio, a real Treasurer, here!"

Gavriel d'Vanecu, of Intrinsic Ire says, "The dishonoured dead have little use for paychecks. We could reduce city expenses considerably."

A laidback city constable straightens up properly, which is not much actually.

An overweight city constable says, "Aye! A real, bona-fide treasurer! We should let him in. And all the treasurers, in fact, aye?"

A laidback city constable says, "You said it, mate."

Gavriel d'Vanecu, of Intrinsic Ire murmurs, "Five preserve us."

A laidback city constable says, "Come come sir Treasureriach sir."

A laidback city constable moves to start opening the doors.

Esca makes a faint gurgling sound, from the back of his throat, though his expression never falters.

Iosen taps his foot with mild impatience.

Heresiarch Esca n'Lochli, Count of the Dominion says, "Every second you waste is less gold in your pay."

A laidback city constable struggles with the lock.

Gavriel stares, eyes burning into the back of the constable's head.

A laidback city constable exclaims, "There!"

A laidback city constable says, "Lets go mate, nothing for us to do."

Lavinya

A laidback city constable exclaims, "Well slap my hiney and call me Prudenzio, a real Treasurer, here!"

I may have made a gross giggle snort sound here. Highly amusing!

Pectus

*spends the entire event pissing off the Constables* 

Drocilla

Darn it Pectus, stop bribing my constables!

Pectus

NO! @Rideta said I could visit the urchin any time I wanna! 

Drocilla

The Commissioner will hear of this.

Siam

A laidback city constable says, "Come come sir Treasureriach sir."

Gold. Pure gold.

Zagreus

Siam said:

A laidback city constable says, "Come come sir Treasureriach sir."

Gold. Pure gold.

Agree, I chuckled at work reading that.. and someone stared at me awkwardly.

Aeldra

Somehow I was reminded of Pratchett reading this. It was hilarious to read, thanks for sharing :-)

Ushaara

Also reminded of Fred & Nobby!

Drocilla

 

 

Lehki

Aeldra said:

Somehow I was reminded of Pratchett reading this. It was hilarious to read, thanks for sharing :-)

Yeah I was definitely thinking of the Night Watch while reading this.

Pectus

@Gavriel was so kind as to make this for me, for you, @Drocilla

Xeria

if you guys liked terry prachett's the  night watch in book form. I strongly recommend that you listen  to them  in audiobook form, if you haven't already.

Drocilla

Pectus said:

@Gavriel was so kind as to make this for me, for you, @Drocilla

@Pectus is asking to be introduced to the Commissioner. 

Luce

Xeria said:

if you guys liked terry prachett's the  night watch in book form. I strongly recommend that you listen  to them  in audiobook form, if you haven't already.

Also the Witch books. Nanny's bath chapter in Lords and Ladies delivered in an absolute deadpan that only makes it amazing. Narration is spot on, and the panicked voices of the villagers had me cracking up.

Xeria

all of the audiobooks are amazing and absolutely spot on! The narration brought the discworld to life - i read the books and liked them but thought that they were somewhat the same after the umpteen book in the series. I listed to the audiobooks and now I absolutely adore them!



@Luce